so it seems as though although i've changed my major since my freshman year, i'm being called to do the same sorta thing.  my freshman year i had planned on being a chemistry major with the ambition of going on to be a doctor.  the reason i wanted to be a doctor was so that i could go to mexico or another third world, spanish speaking conutry and essentially work for free.  the reason i wanted to do this is to escape the profit-driven mentality that i feel is inevitable in American capitalism. 

however, after some soul searching, i realized that going through with this plan would only be running from the problem.  certainly, it would help a lot of people, people that need this sort of aid.  but i just felt that i would be "copping" out by running from the problem.  i had developed a real interest in philosophy and i felt that if i could develop a philosophical theory, i could make some real differences in this way.  so i am now majoring in spanish and philosophy and planning to be a philosophy professor. 

it's rare that the plans in my life don't change a million times.  a few weeks ago i was at a seminar when the speaker pointed out that American Christian evangelicals are great at being charitable with money but that because we don't give our time, we never really make a difference.  that is incredibly true.  so this made me start to consider giving some time to mission work, or as i like to call it, service.  a few weeks later i went on a weeklong awareness trip to the US/Mexico border and this more or less made up my mind that i would like to donate at least a year to service before grad school.

i have an idea for a program i would like to start on the border.  the problem i noticed down there was that the men are defeated.  imagine living in a culture where the only thing that you are taught is that the man is supposed dominate and provide for the family.  now imagine moving to the border to help your family and not being able to find work and then having your wife find work.  this is a complete role reversal and is completely distressing and confusing the men, not to mention contributing to the violence and problems that are everywhere at the border.  so what are mission groups doing? first, they are doing wonderful work, but from a male perspective, they're only making things worse.  almost every mission/service organization is a feminist or female based organization teaching the women empowerment.  this is great, but how about addressing the problem at the source?  who is talking to the men and teaching them how to treat women? no one.  so that's what i want to do.  i want to start a men's shelter and a men's co-operative to help them earn some dough. 

if you have any comments or suggestions to help me with this, please let me know.